Vale James Waites: Lover of and fighter for the underdog, the glamour puss and all the quirky ratbags
- February 12th, 2014
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James Waites 06.03.1955 – 12.02.2014
Today was a difficult day. The usual morning practicalities and logistics changed with a text message from my mentor and friend, and a voicemail message from a concerned stranger.
James Waites has passed away.
In the early hours of this morning, James went down to Coogee beach for his last swim.
James Waites was a lover.
Many knew his life through a string of reviews and articles about theatre. He was the first to be openly out as a gay writer for a mainstream newspaper.
Jimmy with Madame Lash
Friend and confidant of Patrick White, contemporary of William Yang, friend to countless artists including Jim Sharman: James was ever-present at the start of so many luminaries careers, cheering on the underdog, the undiscovered the left of centre and the unusual.
The luminaries
He loved theatre – for the opportunity it gave to express and engage ideas and feelings. He loved artists and brave statements. And embraced them all with a huge amount of enthusiasm and love.
Having a first read of a Patrick White unpublished manuscript
As his website states:
“James Waites loves are dogs and actors: “Both species are cute to pat, excel in performing wonderful tricks, and lick you all over for humble rewards like liver treats and pieces of cheese ” he observes.”
James Waites was a fighter.
He once told me that being a critic was “really a mix of parish priest and dentist” – and you had to be the bravest to stand up and applaud when everyone else was too scared to. He called a spade a spade – and got fired for it on more than one occasion. He would refuse to clap, exclaim something was “utter crap” if it lacked heart or empathy. He walked his talk. He was brave… early on nick-naming Cate Blanchett and Andrew Upton “Glitter and Fluffy.”
He fought not only battles of the intellect and popular opinion, but physical battles. He had suffered great physical pain, living with a range of illnesses and chronic pain and recently diagnosed with Parkinsons Disease which would keep him up at night in fear and frailty. However, his battles were often put aside for others and he often pushed through to present at opening nights.
James Waites loved the underdog.
Look, he loved all dogs. But especially the underdog. His compassion knew no bounds, taking care of lost and stray pups from multiple walks of life… sometimes offering them shelter, food, what little money he had, comfort, perspective. And often this was not to his benefit. He was the first to “find” Paul Capsis and told me how as soon as he met him – he knew he’d be a star. He spotted Steve Peacocke in 2010 deeming him the next Hollywood hero (and yes that has also come to pass) – he had a genuine midas touch of finding talent and promoting it in his wry and cheeky way.
James Waites kept company with Australia’s best and brightest.
On the table in his dining room was a folder of photos for me to scour through. Photos and postcards of him at dinner, on couches, in foyers with Australia’s best and brightest… Everyone knew James. James knew and loved everyone. Even if there were a few overly colourful stories or cheeky secrets of misbehaviour amongst his peers, friends and colleagues, James loved them all. And loved them especially for their flaws.
James Waites was a romantic.
He’d love love stories. He loved romance. Cuddles from handsome men. Sweet words. He didn’t understand why so much sex in Australian theatre seemed so mechanical and forced and unromantic.
I loved James Waites.
He was more than a critic to me.
He was more than a mentor. More than a friend.
James was also my family. I am the keeper of his history, and I’ll be arranging his memorial in the next few days.
He likened us to Grotowskian wolves howling to each other in the darkness. At 2am or 6am or 1pm whenever – I’d stop to answer his call. He’d stop to answer mine. We spoke, texted or wrote to each other daily in the last 2 years of his life.
We were collaborators. I read all his reviews and edited made suggestions – for the Australian Book Review, his essay for Belvoir’s 25th Anniversary Book. His Currency House Platform paper: Whatever Happened to the STC Actor’s Company. He’d read me, give me notes… tell me when I was on track… or too soft. He introduced me to everyone.
People he loved, artists he admired. The arts was his life. His community meant everything to him.
Though he couldn’t write often due to his energy levels and the side effects of medication and his Parkinsons… but a facebook post attracting comment and likes from his community would inspire him for days.
Thank you to all those who have called and messaged, texted and contacted me. It’s a sad day for us as we have lost a gentleman, a lover, a parish priest, a dentist, a thinker and one of the worlds most generous humans.
Whilst I begin with the paper and preparations – tying up loose ends and getting things in order – I am reminded through the flood of love, well wishes, offers to assist, offerings of condolences and deed-doing… what a truly remarkable community James gathered around him – full of loving generous, adventurous, compassionate souls. How proud he is, was and would be of how we have come together in this sad moment.
And I will miss him.
Forever. More than anyone will know, and more than I can fathom right now.
As I left Maggie Blinco’s house today, she reminded me of a story that summed James up. Last Christmas she was walking with him and they passed a drunk man on the street who was lying in full Summer sun. James, with little strength and coordination picked up the man, moved him into the shade. The man fell back asleep not knowing that a stranger had helped him.
I thank James for all he has done, to make sure I was sheltered. I already miss his shelter and the comfort of knowing he’s there.
Details of a memorial service will be announced on Friday 21st February 2014 at http://jameswaites.com/ . The memorial will be open to all who loved him, all he loved and those who respected and revered this irreverent, energetic, larrikin statesman of Arts and Culture.
Thank you
Jim was family, he was witty,clever and he was a fantastic story teller. I remember him from a very young age at all my family gatherings, Not only was he the best dressed but he was one of the most outspoken men i have ever had the pleasure of knowing and i am so glad that he is as well loved among friends as he was loved among our family.My thoughts go out to his sister Trish and all his loved ones as he will sorely be missed.
thank you again
My beautiful uncle Jim.
No words will ever express how much we loved you. No matter how much we prepared ourselves we were never ready to let you go. You brought so much fun and entertainment into our lives. So much knowledge. You had so much life experience to share. And so many lessons to teach. Your sense of humor was a force to be reckoned with. Your life was an everlasting roller coaster, we never knew where the next twist, turn and loop was going to happen. It was an honor to be related to you, to love you, and to be loved by you. I am so, so grateful you got to hold your great nieces and nephew.
There is no way to express the heartache that we are all feeling at your passing. The world became so much smaller when you left it.
You left this world the way you lived your life “ON YOUR OWN TERMS”
I hope that you have found your pain-free place among the stars where you belong.
For always and forever.
We love you and miss you
Gone but never forgotten
Rest in peace Uncle Jim
Love and light. Your niece
Kirsten
Thank you Augusta.
For everything you have done and continue to do.
Thank you for making it possible for everyone to share this tragic moment.
With much love
Kirsten Waites
I was ‘managing’ until your last anecdote of James moving the sleeping drunk from the sun into the shade. It so perfectly sums him up, and that’s when the tears came. Thank you so much for such a moving tribute to an extraordinary man. I first got to know James in the mid eighties, and continually found him such an inspiration as a writer and as a person. You say it so well – the planet has lost one of its best fighters for the underdogs, the glamour pusses and the quirky ratbags. Thank you James. I hope you’re now pain-free, swimming in clear beautiful waters.
dear gus
terrible news for you
do take good care of yourself
I am so sorry for your loss
the ones you love are lucky
he knew how much you loved him
love helen o xxx
Thank you Kirsten,
It is an honour to host such an outpouring of love. Please accept my sincerest condolences for the loss of your uncle.
And I am swept away by Jim’s loving, loyal friends and family.
James loved so many people, and was in return, loved by so many. This time belongs to everyone who was touched by his brave and fearless love of life.
He loved you and Chris very much. Very much.
I look forward to meeting you at his memorial services…
And this is merely a place holder for us to come together as his motley crew to remember and rejoice in the great, beautiful, intelligent scallywag – Jim.
Sending love and great respect.
A X
Augusta, thanks for the beautiful tribute to your wonderful uncle. I lived with Jim for a few years on Victoria Street and can vouch that he was great mentor and even better friend. My heart goes out to his family and loved ones.
He used to joke that he should call his autobiography “I Who Have Nothing” (he preferred the Shirley Bassey version—natch), but anyone who knew him can attest that he had intelligence and heart to spare. He will be plenty missed.
Please do post details about the service. I am in NYC and unable to attend but I would love to send flowers and to contribute in any way I can.
Love
Horacio
x
Wow – Augusta, this is so beautiful and perfectly said.
Kristen and family our thoughts are with you all.
Jim was for a time also my family when he was the partner of my own cherished Uncle Jason.
So from all of the Peterson Family – we send our love and feel grateful that Jim touched our lives.
All we have to give each other is love.
Blessings to you dear Augusta.
Courageous James is now free.
In beauty and sadness, I am so sorry for your loss.
He loved you greatly.
I didn’t know Jim well personally – but, as long as I have been working in the Theatre, (30 years), he was THERE! A part of it. A prominent, generous, articulate member of this extraordinary and sometimes dysfunctional “family” we call the Australian Theatre. He reviewed my shows, I read his articles, and we met in foyers hundreds of times for brief chats. We recently promised to “do lunch” together, after he interviewed me for a TV documentary. I always sensed he was the kind of rare Theatre practitioner, and man, that you describe in your beautiful tribute to him. But we never did lunch. My loss. The Theatre has lost a brilliant analyst and commentator, a leading creative light, a Statesman, a larrikin, a caring and genuine soul, a Gentleman. How fortunate are those who knew him well and loved him. How sad for ALL of us that he is gone. Profound sadness. Gale Edwards
Beautiful . Kristen my thoughts are with you
Kirsten, I am sad for you and us all. What a great love we all had for him. I have been thinking of you most during the last days.
Thank you for writing such beautiful.
@Kirsten Waites
Dearest Jimmy
was only the other week we were both at the vegie shop near Coles together.. you were always so calm and dry witted. you puss puss and Me will miss you as will all your many friends and family
Love Andrew Harris and Sofie(and Maxxi and Khan) xoxoxox
Thank you so much for a wonderful tribute. So good to know he had a more-than-friendship like this. I was close to Jim for a while oh so long ago in the 70s, the Paris Theatre days, and in recent years was admiringly following his writings from time to time from far away, always thinking that one day we’d meet again. Time to think about his dear, smart, brave being.
James, what a beautiful man you are
last seen in Devonshire Street outside the Shakespeare Hotel of course:“Words are easy, like the wind; Faithful friends are hard to find.”
Darling Jim, you beauty rich & rare. What a courageous, & beautifully Australian way to die.
You’ve set a high benchmark for integrity, intelligence, honesty, style – among others,
you were, no, are an inspiration.
Jim Waites had a profound understanding of actors and their practice, and of what the theatre can do. He began his career as a dramaturg and worked productively with cutting-edge directors like Jim Sharman and Rex Cramphorn. When he became a theatre journalist in the 1980s it made him an unswerving partisan on the side of the creative team, reviewing notably for the National Times and later the Bulletin. For me his legacy will be the Platform Paper Whatever Happened to the STC Actors Company? (2009), a commission he undertook reluctantly and in some pain. But it remains a fine work, entering by turn into the decision-making of each party, describing without rancour the story of a bright experiment that achieved much but succumbed to external pressures and ran aground too soon. A common story in the arts. Jim Waites was one more in a band of distinctive and often inconvenient theatre talents for the loss of whom our country is the poorer.
Beautiful piece Augusta
Thank you for sharing
Jim Waites was my dear friend and that honoured me because he was pure of heart. He rose above enmity, the petty and mediocre because he was generous, compassionate, joyful; a rare human being, who embraced life, who loved and who was brave. That was, IS my Jim.
James was relentless, passionate, curious and fearless. He fought for the best in all of us. He helped me understand that fighting for what we believed in was a corollary of being an artist. His departure diminishes our world.
Thank you dear James, for your fearless and public support of new ABC radio work, including mine. A great colleague and friend.
It’s so far back i cant remember how i got to know James Waite but i presume we were at University of New South Wales together. Somehow we became talking buddies and got close quick, and then about 30 years passed and we recognised each other in Broadway Centre, the old Grace Brothers at top of Glebe, and we shared sushi and he showed me some site he’d created for his favourite Mario Brothers.
Hearing about his passing today (through Boom Boom being online and going to her page and seeing a message from Roger Foley Fogg) is sort of so meaningful, as if he’s calling his mates to remember him; and i will be there at the memorial. He was … a few moments ago that would have been is … one of those people that even 30 years didnt dampen our memories of great times.
Had just poured out the last of the xmas gin … it had been waiting for around a month for some tonic.
Ok, it’s sunk in now. Love to All
@Kirsten Waites
Hi Kirsten,
I went to university with Trish and was a frequent visitor to your home when you were young.In recent years I have lost contact with her, and other than by this method, I know of no way in which to pass on my deepest sympathy during this difficult time.
I wanted to pass on my conolences to both you and her. Whilst it has been many years since i have seen Jim, I have fond memories of him and always enjoyed his company.
I know times such as these can be both sad and stressful, and my thoughts are with you.
jameswaites.ilatech.org
James Arthur Waites (06.03.1955 – 12.02.2014)
Arts journalist and writer, mentor to many in the arts community and theatre critic James Waites passed away at Coogee Beach on the morning of the 12th February, aged 58.
James had been suffering from long-term illnesses and had recently been diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. With his health in terminal decline, he made the considered decision for his last swim to be at Coogee while he was still in a position to do so.
Jim Waites will be remembered by all who knew him as a deeply compassionate individual who was a devoted brother to his sister Patricia, uncle to Chris and Kirsten, lover, mentor, teacher and friend of many.
Details of a memorial service will be available on this site and elsewhere from Friday 21st February 2014.
The Australian Arts community have acknowledged his passing on Facebook, Twitter, blogs and print press. Selected links are included at the end of the brief and potted biography that follows.
*****
”We must remember that each performance is a unique work of art, merely bearing a similarity to the performance the night before, and other evenings yet to come. Then there’s the matter of what each of us brings to the encounter.” – JAMES WAITES
we have lost a great soul… I wrote to him on the 10th… on the 12th he was gone… I have no idea if he even saw my message
Jim saved my life in Sydney. He took me under his wing when we wrote for G magazine, and when G Magazine collapsed. He taught me how to cook rice through the absorption method. And we watched that’s my bush and serge the seal of death… and he paid for tickets for us to see bob dylan in the rain at centennial park…
Jim was a wise man, a battered man… he’d worked with the best; hell, Patrick White gave Jim his typewriter… he introduced me to william yang, who uses jim’s garage as a dark room, and we brunched with Bob Trevorow (bob downe for all you ingrates
)… we did coffee on oxford st… saw requiem for a dream in newtown cinemas… he gave me a postcard of allen ginsberg in tangeirs which I treasure… but he gave me so much more
i believe he went well – he loved swimming… he loved living… he just didn’t love the bullshit that came from people who fucked things up…
he was the first guy I ever met who taught me about how to live with a permanent condition – in Jim’s case, HIV… he supported my move to come back to my hometown after I’d had my breakdown in Sydney… fuck he supported so much of what I did…
and he taught me a lot when I was reviewing and writing… and he left us many things… including this, which is probably a far better summary of his spirit than i can ever say:
I live in the pain of never really being able to express myself directly. And so I figure the next best thing is to encourage others attempting the same. Being a critic, which I think is a disgusting word, is probably the stupidest way to go about such a goal because it can encourage such nay-saying. I know I have hurt many people in the past. These days I try to take a gentler path – looking for work that I can ‘speak up’; and only going to the negative when I feel I cannot possibly, in all conscience, avoid it.
jim was one of my first mentors, one of the first to get what I was trying to do, and one whose ethics taught me much about why Sydney was not the place for me; if Jim, as chief theatre critic, could get sacked from the sydney morning herald for taking on a shitty production of Les Mis because of nepotism, well then maybe sydney wasn’t the place to make it after all…
one final memory of Jim… we’re on the green lawn outside Sydney’s Museum of Modern Art, me smoking my camel unfiltered, him having a joint, on one of Sydney’s blisteringly blue days, looking at the harbour in front of us, the opera house, cruising the guys wandering past. Jim stubs out his joint in the grass besides us, gets up and walks over to a suit, with two bodyguards, striding by. Turns out to be the state premier, Bob Carr (later foreign minister under the Gillard/Rudd govt), who Jim was friends with from his journo days. He had a quick conversation,said goodbye, and came back to me, this nobody, lit up his joint again and we kept talking about the world of ideas, the world of books and music and film and art…
out into the ocean jim… swim on…
wave thou art pretty.
wave thou art high
wave thou are music
wave thou are white
(oh albino)
(oh albino)
wave thou art high
(wave thou art pretty)
wave to the city
wave
goodbye.
goodbye sir.
goodbye papa